For anyone who doesn’t want to hear how miserable I’m feeling, yet again, click the back button now. There I warned you.
I got screwed over by yet another friend. I’ve defended her when people have slagged her off, I’ve always believed the best in her and she screwed me over. Thanks.
I just feel…………………..
Empty. All I want to do is cry and not stop. I want to scream and lash out at myself but can’t. I want to go back in time to when I felt safe and loved and was happy.
I get told to think positive, but positive about what?
That I’m alone?
I don’t see an end to the tunnel.
It gets easier.
But I’m still alone.
I don’t understand what I’ve done to lose the only thing I’ve ever wanted. I don’t understand why I can’t have it. I don’t understand why I can see people who seem to have found that someone and done nothing to deserve it when I’ve given so much to the universe and I’m deprived of it.
All day something inside of me has been crying. Probably that stupid little girl. I cried during work a little and on the way home. Now I’m going to cry some more because if I don’t let it out then I’ll explode.
See I did warn you I was feeling depressed.
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5 comments:
Crying is good. It's a sad fact of life that people don't treat you right, you just have to keep being true to yourself and being selective over who you trust, and with some luck you could end up with some good friends and relationships. Take it easy for a day or two.
I am feeling *so* guilty now. Because maurice doesn't let me know when you've blogged, I've missed the start of your sadness and hurt, even though I've got a link on mine to yours. Also, I haven't been in the chat very much at all the last few weeks as other stuff seems to have taken over. I'm really sorry about what you're going through - I can assure you it has happened to me a couple of times and I know it seems, no, is, unbearable for quite some time. Nothing I can say can make you feel any better now but I hope the rest of your journey to the end of the tunnel is a short one. x
Crying is good, like what Andre said. Communicating about it is good.
You ARE strong. It's just taking a bit of effort to get over things.
You even get new blog readers;-)
Keep your pecker up honeybunch
I could say a few cliches but won't as I know that all you need is a friend and I hope I can be that for you.
Chin up and it won't last forever.
There I said them anyway.
ttfn jane
Here's a good thing about me.....Im feeling great!!! Ok I dont know how that makes you feel but I've had the best 2 days and Im teliing you this because Now i can be here more for you again. Have you tried just walking in a park or just closing your bedroom door when no ones home and yelling "FUCK IT!!!!" Try it. It could help
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